I knew even from childhood that I wanted to be a mom; a stay-at-home mom; a homeschooling-stay-at-home mom. I knew that was an important job. After all, children are people! I wanted to be there for all the important moments of the little people’s lives, helping to shape them. However, what I never would have said I wanted to “grow up to be” is a homemaker. Now, I know that homemaking tends to come with the territory of childrearing. That reality has required an attitude adjustment from me—and still requires one daily. One idea I’ve stumbled upon in the past year that has greatly aided me to align my attitude is that our Lord Jesus Himself is a kind of Homemaker.
Before I explore that intriguing claim, let’s consider: Why was I so surprised to find myself a homemaker? Why did the word taste bad in my mouth? Why have I refused to buy an apron, even though it would save me a lot of grease-stained shirts? Upon reflection, I’ve found three reasons why I both startled and turned my nose up when I discovered that I had become a homemaker.
Three Problems
The first problem is that I did not consider homemaking to be true work. It didn’t sound like the right answer to the question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” It felt like a nice way to talk about someone who hadn’t finished their education and had no other options. Our society almost exclusively defines any positive idea of work as something that earns money or fulfills a passion. I certainly do not have a passion for putting shoes where they go and cleaning crud off the highchair. And though in a roundabout way I could argue that I’m saving my family money by caring for our home and child myself, I don’t ever bring home a paycheck; so it doesn’t feel like a financial decision either.
The second problem is that I didn’t understand what a home truly is. Although we often speak about our culture’s distorted view of marriage and family, I’m not sure how often we realize that those issues are connected to the problem of misunderstanding what a home really is. Home is often either sentimentalized or under-valued. It is either the place where we always feel warm and fuzzy, or the necessary landing pad for all of our junk when we’re taking a break from our real lives outside the home. We either elevate the physical aspects of our home, throwing our money at better furniture and home décor, or scoff at the need for a physical retreat, insisting that the cluttered desks and dust bunnies are a sign we are focused on the intangible things that are truly important.
The third problem is that when I found myself with this new job, I quickly realized that I wasn’t very good at it. How could such menial tasks be so demanding? Could it really be this difficult to come up with something to eat every day? My eighteen years of formal education had not prepared me for this. How could I improve at something for which I couldn’t study? Who was going to give me a class?[1] And why put effort into improving something that most people in my life will never see anyway? Was the result (an unquantifiable concept in homemaking) really worth the effort?
One Solution
Enter Christ, our Homemaker.
Isn’t the whole story of the Bible about a Home, after all? The creation narrative of Genesis 2 details how all of God’s “making” became a home for the man and woman. “And the Lord God planted a garden . . . and there he put the man whom he had formed” (Gen. 2:8, ESV). And Paul reveals in Colossians that this home was made through Christ (Col. 1:16). In fact, He even now “sustains all things by his powerful word” (Heb. 1:3, NIV). Christ even now actively maintains our earthly home. It is His continual work.
In addition to upholding our current home, Christ has told us Himself the business with which He has been occupied since His ascension: “I go to prepare a place for you” (Jn. 14:2, KJV). The Lord Jesus is preparing the “many rooms” in His Father’s house for the homecoming of His adopted family. Christ is engaged in eternal hospitality on our behalf. Supper is in the works. “See, I have prepared my dinner, my oxen and my fat calves have been slaughtered, and everything is ready. Come to the wedding feast” (Mt. 22:4, ESV).
Problems Redeemed
So then: Is homemaking true work? Is it worthy work? It is Christ’s work. And when done for His glory in our own homes, we can be a small reflection of Him. As Mary Kassian and Nancy Leigh DeMoss put it in their study on biblical womanhood,
Contemporary Western culture greatly devalues what happens in the home. It views homemaking as a conglomeration of meaningless tasks such as cleaning toilets, scrubbing floors, folding laundry . . . things a monkey could be trained to do. But . . . [w]hen we create a home, we provide . . . [a] place that foreshadows the welcome believers will receive in heaven. A place that calls and beckons them “Home.”[2]
Yes, the work done in our homes is often monotonous. But as G. K. Chesterton speculates, “Perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony.”[3] Perhaps He is even strong enough to empower us to exult in Him in the midst of our monotony.
The Home that Christ is preparing for us is not immaterial; neither is it merely physical. Our heavenly Home—the perfecting, redeeming, and re-making of the Earth—is where our most lively lives will begin (“When Christ, who is your life, appears . . .” [Col. 3:4; emphasis added]). “Is it fair to say that country is more real than ours?”[4] If our little, imperfect homes are to point our families and friends to their true Home, we must balance its relational, spiritual, and physical aspects. Our décor and organizational methods matter, because beauty communicates truth. But our attitudes and relationships matter as well; goodness begets beauty. The physical state of our homes, and the attitude with which we accomplish that state, can encourage its occupants and visitors to dwell on whatever is true, lovely, and good.
And indeed, if our homes are little Heavens, they are the most significant of places. They are where true life happens. The greatest consciousness of our sin and our deepest need for redemption arise daily in home-life. Each member of the family sins and is sinned against; a harsh word is spoken, or a promise unkept. It happens in the family room, the bedroom, and over the kitchen table. We all fall on our knees at the end of the day and God forgives us. In those same rooms God enables us to forgive each other. Homemaking sets the stage on which these scenes of life play out.
Finally, the fact remains: I’m still not very good at the job. I would imagine none who are called to the task of homemaking are as good as they should be. Thankfully, my home is not my forever-home. The work done in my play kitchen is a solemn mimicry of Christ’s work; I can take joy in these little tasks knowing that He is preparing me to share in His own eternal labor and that He provides me with all the “energy that he powerfully works within me” (Col. 1:29, ESV). And though the world may not understand or value work done in secret, our Father sees the secret labor, and He is the rewarder of those who seek Him.
[1]I have since found a fantastic resource in continuing education for homemakers offered at www.SimplyConvivial.com. Mystie Winkler’s work has greatly influenced my own thinking on this issue.
[2]Mary A. Kassian and Nancy Leigh DeMoss, True Woman 101 (Chicago: Moody, 2012), 82–83.
[3]G. K. Chesterton, Orthodoxy (San Francisco: Ignatius, 1995), 65.
[4]Leif Enger, Peace Like a River (New York: Grove, 2001), 303.
May 13, 2020
Most interesting! Great ideas and well said!
May 20, 2020
I definitely find it an interesting topic; it helps make my day-to-day more interesting. Thank you for reading!