Empathy muscles are being used by many different people right now. Serving in ministry can be overwhelming at any time, and that fact is certainly true now. COVID-19 has had an impact on everyone in our world in at least some capacity. If you are caring for people, the challenge now is to maintain resilience in order to keep doing the work of caring with energy and compassion.
The danger involved in caring for others is facing burnout without even noticing the signs. Sometimes ministry training can include how to take care of other people with little focus on the need to care for your own body. Ministry leader, you have a soul. It’s okay to care for yourself.
In this article, I’d like to focus on the necessity to care for ourselves while we are caring for each other. While self-care can encompass different areas, I will focus on three specifically: spiritual self-care, physical self-care, and emotional self-care.
Spiritual Self-care
I intentionally list this area of self-care first because our Lord places priority here first. Jesus carefully tells us, “Man must not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of God” (Mt. 4:4, CSB). Jesus’ reference here to “every word that comes from the mouth of God” looks back to an Old Testament theme showing how God’s words are not idle (see Dt. 8:3). Rather, His words should be received and given primacy. The application made in Matthew 4:4 is similar to the application made in Deuteronomy: Obeying God is more important than being well-fed. Jesus, the true and final Israel, hungered for righteousness more than bread and thirsted for obedience more than water, and He urges us to do the same.
Similarly, in his first letter to Timothy, the apostle Paul gives instruction for what a good servant of Jesus Christ should focus on. He writes, “Train yourself in godliness. For the training of the body has limited benefit, but godliness is beneficial in every way since it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. This saying is trustworthy and deserves full acceptance” (Tim. 4:7b–9). Paul compares godliness with athletic training in that both require training. He uses a specific Greek word for “train” in this text that encourages discipline, hard work, and sacrifice.
I often wonder how Christians are practicing spiritual self-care especially in light of the pandemic. Church gatherings are limited in size or canceled altogether. Ministry leaders are discouraged. The immediate effects can be seen now, but I do wonder what long-term effects these realities will have on believers. No doubt we can all agree on the need for godliness. Perhaps these times of isolation have shed light on personal sins in need of repenting. Maybe God is calling some to serve in a missionary context, even while in isolation.
Physical Self-care
Your body will tell you if something is wrong. I work with some of the bravest healthcare heroes, and I hear about many of their physical pains right now: sore feet, aching backs, and trouble sleeping at night.
As Paul said in the passage above, caring for our physical bodies has benefit. Exercising regularly will help to release stress. I often utilize breathing exercises to help with my own anxiety and the patients’ anxiety I care for. Box breathing is especially helpful: Simply picture a box and focus your breathing patterns around the four corners of the box. The point is to help your body to relax.
Sleep is another area that falls under this category. Your body will certainly communicate if you’re not getting enough rest each night. Lastly, simply getting enough to eat and drink is important. Consistent unhealthy eating habits and dehydration can inhibit energy and focus throughout the day.
All these areas are important because “your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you” (1 Cor. 6:19).
Emotional Self-care
I recently re-read The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis this past advent season, and I was struck once again by his portrayal of emotions and feelings in each character. In his book, The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, Lewis depicts how each character feels at first hearing the name of Aslan. Lewis writes,
Each one of the children felt something jump in its inside. Edmund felt a sensation of mysterious horror. Peter felt suddenly brave and adventurous. Susan felt as if some delicious smell or some delightful strain of music and just floated by her. And Lucy got the feeling you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that it is the beginning of the holidays or the beginning of Summer.[1]
In this section, and many others, Lewis shows how feelings and emotions are real. However, these feelings and emotions don’t exist for just our own benefit. They exist to bring us back to God, who made us as human beings with these emotions. Each one of us, like the characters in Narnia, can decide whether we want to step into this pain that we feel and re-orient our focus back towards God. I do think this process of re-orienting feelings and emotions takes time.
I’ve been in numerous situations as a hospice chaplain when a person dies. And it’s in these moments, while providing compassionate presence, I’ve noticed the different coping mechanisms and the different ways that people grieve. Simply think through the process of loss, specifically death. Why do we express sadness during these difficult times? Why do we cry? I feel that these emotions tell us that this is not the way things were intended to be. The shock of death tells us that this shouldn’t be the norm, but it is for now.
This entire process of having a pulse on our emotions is important. The way we feel in certain situations should be processed. It’s important to ask yourself regularly, “Do I need to talk to someone about how I’m feeling?” Your default response is likely not to tell anybody that you are not strong, which is why the self-reflection is needed.
Conclusion
None of us would have chosen COVID-19 to happen, but all of us can choose what we will take out of this tragic time. I’ve personally felt the weight of caring for patients on a behavioral health unit during a pandemic. In my current job, I talk to family members every day who are unable to visit their loved ones in a nursing facility. Caring for other people is hard work. And it’s necessary to care for yourself. I want to keep caring for people as I believe God has called me to do, but I also realize the necessity for caring for myself in the face of difficult work.
[1]C. S. Lewis, The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe (New York: Harper Collins, 1950), 74.
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