by Emily Vickery
The Biblical command to be hospitable often makes us feel the need to buy better decorations for the living room or find the perfect recipe for teacakes. It conjures up images of lace doilies and fine china and often leaves us feeling quite unable to measure up to the Mary Berrys and Joanna Gaineses of the world. But it doesn’t have to be this way.
In her latest book, Rosaria Butterfield advocates for what she refers to as “radically ordinary hospitality.”[1] Radically ordinary hospitality is not concerned with the perfect home aesthetic or awe-inspiring recipes but simply seeks to see “strangers becoming neighbors and neighbors becoming family of God.”[2] This kind of hospitality is not driven by a need to impress others or to entertain but instead to show the grace and truth that we have been shown in Christ to those around us.
Divine Hospitality
As Christians, we have all been recipients of the grace of God inviting us into fellowship with Him and giving us, through the work of Christ, a place in His family and at His table. We see ourselves in the story of the broken Mephibosheth, a descendant of David’s vengeful predecessor, being given a place at the king’s table when, customarily, his fate would have been death (2 Sam. 9:1–13). Our desire to show hospitality to others, to help meet their needs, and to welcome them into our homes and lives should stem from this marvelous gift we have been given. Hospitality is also a practice repeatedly encouraged and even commanded of God’s people in both the Old and New Testaments.[3]
As believers, this posture of service to those around us should be our normal way of life, not the exception to it. While our hospitality will not save its recipients, it allows them unfiltered access to our working out our faith in our day-to-day lives. It gives them a freedom to ask difficult questions and share real burdens with us, and it gives us the opportunity to share Biblical answers and Christ-like love.
In a time when the Christian faith is increasingly marginalized, our willingness to serve and to love those who are very much different than we are seems an odd way to live. But if we wish to reach those around us—fellow bearers of the image of God—with the gospel, it is in precisely this way that we must live. We must intentionally and actively seek out opportunities to build relationships with our neighbors, and not just the ones who attend church with us on Sundays.
Butterfield offers an important caveat here, however: We are called to dine with sinners but not to sin with them.[4] While Biblical hospitality involves loving those who do not share our Biblical worldview, it does not include accepting that non-Biblical worldview as a valid option or to affirm the sin in which the individuals live. While doing so might at first seem to be a comforting option, it effectively amounts to tying a millstone around their necks.
Where to Begin
Many of us may feel a strong desire to live more hospitable, service-oriented lives, but, because of our current financial, marital, or living situations, we may be overwhelmed by wondering how to begin. Again, I remind you that this hospitality is not lace-doily-oriented but instead is focused on opening our eyes to the needs and lives of those around us. God can use the church and its individual members in so many ways to meet the needs of others, and these efforts can begin by simply recognizing that each person we meet is a fellow bearer of the image of God.
This act of obedience could simply look like striking up a conversation with our neighbors to become aware of ways we can begin praying for them or scheduling an evening stroll at the same time a family down the street walks their dogs. And it may start by asking the Lord to help you see and respond to the ways He could use you for His glory in your current setting. It may also mean intentionally living below your means to have more opportunities for hospitality. Christian hospitality may take place largely in your home or apartment, but it can also be exhibited in helping with a local homeless mission or prison ministry.
How do we commit to following this Biblical directive without becoming bogged down or burnt out? Another encouraging concept of Biblical hospitality is that the roles of host and guest are interchangeable. Because you aren’t attempting to entertain or impress with your immaculate home or impeccable hosting abilities, this brand of hospitality means that both host and guest can minister and be ministered to. You may have a neighbor over for dinner only to have them help with dishes after the meal.
Accepting help from those to whom you’re showing hospitality allows both parties opportunities to serve one another and to humble themselves in receiving help. To be hospitable does not equate to being completely in charge and in control. Our willingness to share the most mundane tasks of life with our neighbors can allow those relationships to deepen in a way that performance-focused hospitality efforts could hinder.
An Example
Perhaps a real example of up-close-and-personal hospitality would be helpful. When my husband and I moved to Cambridge, England, in 2017 for him to begin graduate studies, we knew no one. It would have been easy to feel completely isolated and overwhelmed in the first few weeks there, and there were moments when those emotions were keenly felt. When we arrived in Cambridge, we could not move into the student accommodation that we had acquired for another two weeks. Prior to our move, we had reached out to a local church in the area, and the Student Pastor there, along with his wife, graciously offered their guest room to us for those two weeks.
Mark and Katie welcomed two foreign strangers into their lives for our first fourteen days in the country, willingly answered all our odd questions, and graciously slowed down their pace of life (quite literally, on the bike path) to help us accommodate to a new country and culture. We shared meals and dish-washing duties. We taught one another our favorite games and prayed together about needs in our lives and the lives of those close to us. This compassionate hospitality gave us housing but also provided the first steps we needed in making a home in Cambridge.
Conclusion
How can God use each of us, just as He used Mark and Katie, in the work of seeing strangers as neighbors and neighbors as the family of God? In what areas of our lives are we clutching tightly to resources or gifts from the Lord that could be better used when offered up to Him in open hands? We must all allow the Holy Spirit to reveal to us the ways He has equipped us to meet or at least help bear the needs of those around us. At times such hospitality may be uncomfortable or require sacrifice. In those times, we are given yet another opportunity to seek the Lord’s grace and strength rather than relying on our own efforts. God can use our obedience in this area not only to encourage others in their walk with Him but also to strengthen and grow our faith as well.
About
the Author: Emily Vickery lives
with her husband, Zach in Clayton, North Carolina. She is a graduate of Welch
College and is currently completing a Master’s degree in mental health
counseling from the University of the Cumberlands. When she isn’t focused on
schoolwork, she enjoys reading, traveling, and cheering on her favorite sports
teams with her husband.
[1]Rosaria Butterfield, The Gospel Comes with a House Key: Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality in Our Post-Christian World (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2018), 13.
[2]Ibid.
[3]For a good overview of this theme in Scripture, see John Piper, “Strategic Hospitality,” Desiring God, August 25, 1985, accessed June 10, 2019; https://www.desiringgod.org/messages/strategic-hospitality.
[4]Butterfield, 54.
Recent Comments